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Tuesday, January 30, 2007
Resolution January 30th 2007I'm gonna leave with my chin up and my spirits high. It's been a good run, the best so far, and I should be proud of that. I've had the greatest time with my bestest friends; I've met a wonderful bunch of people that I can forsee being friends with in the long run while I was working; I had a fantastic experience working on a blast of a show; I've had my fair share of romance; my family has been nothing short of supportive and I can see them slowly coming to terms with the fact that they're going to have to let me fly from the coup eventually.This has been a fantastic break, and there is nothing more I could hope for. I'm filled with expectations and excitement for the new academic year. Honours is going to be rigorous, but nothing short of fulfilling, I can feel it in my bones.I'm gonna walk through those glass panes with my chin up and my heart soaring. Tears are for the regretful. I don't do those tears justice. It's through the glass panes and into DFS shopping.Now, it's time to get cracking on the packing.
Saturday, January 27, 2007
I think I've become a cruel heartless person. Okie, maybe not totally cruel and heartless, but hard hearted and distant. When it seems to me that I've opened up and become vulnerable, it takes no more than two days to make me realise I merely thought I opened up. I'm still as hard as ever. That aside, I think the harsh, vindictive, non-forgiving side in me has arisen, and that is not good, not good at all. It seems that the olden days were carefree and reckless. Nowadays it's all tentative and guarded. I feel like a tiger with a sore paw. What's wrong with me? I kinda like this lashing out at people. On the one hand, I don't have to tolerate much unnecessary shit anymore. But on the other hand, it ultimately doesn't really do much to better things, does it? I don't know, it's like I'm playing Good Cop Bad Cop with myself.
Saturday, January 06, 2007
My Magic Number lies between 15 and 25. Take a guess, anybody?So after a long debaucherous and humourless(not) ponder about our non-existent love/sex life, we're still back at "Why is it just us?", and we're reduced to being white gay men in asian women bodies/any gay man in women bodies, or just plain butch. Gee, the future sure looks promising doesn't it?Why is it that some people are driving potential suitors away in droves, and we're still sitting on our asses, drowning our sorrows in gin in the neighbourhood watering-hole/auntie-pub on a Friday night, looking forward to sleeping in on the weekend, when other people our age are going out and getting trashed? I am awake, and I'm at home on a Friday night, at 1.33am. This cannot be happening. I feel like I'm being cheated of my Friday night. I've waited 6days to Friday, and I'm not even getting trashed and blind. have I truly grown old before my time? Should I just go and put myself out there, as they say? But I'm too chicken, and too cynical to be playing that field. I'm just gonna content myself with... alcohol, and cake, and the company of other single friends... I'm living the life of a 22 year old spinster basically. Welcome to the Asian version of the Bridget Jones Diary, minus the suave wanker-of-a-boss Hugh Grant, and the cool brooding I-love-you-just-as-you-are Colin Firth. Not much of a best seller is it?Oh how I wish I could just be daring and just do it, damn my fear of rejection and chicken sized gut.
Tuesday, January 02, 2007
Ahhh, first post of the year. How do I feel? Positive? Slightly. Excited? Just the usual.My parents have been accusing each other of becoming senile. That's quite amusing, except that I think they're both right. Now that's a scary thought.Well, the year was off to a good start, watching ships set off their iridescent flares which shone bright and red in the night sky and slowly descend down into the ocean, as if they were little power packed balls of energy waiting to touch down on the earth and spread their radiance. That was a lovely moment, coupled with friends who muck around not fearing what people would think of them. People who are true to themselves. My New Year resolution (the first one I've ever made) shall be to surround myself with as many such people as possible. Do not let me buy into superficiality. Let me be brave and wear my heart on my sleeve. Whoever doesn't like me can go burn in hell. I'll personally see to that. I have a blowtorch and I'm not afraid to use it. That aside, hopefully Honours will be a great fantabulous year and I'll enrich my mind as much as I can, what with the PO coaching us. Just tame my claws against the irritating person in my batch.
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