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Wednesday, August 30, 2006
You know how sometimes you want to say something yet you don't really have a very clear idea as to what it is you want to express? Well, I'm in one of those moods right now. In fact, I've constantly been in that mood for the past few days. I don't know. I fear I'm fucking things up. I fear I'm fucking myself up. I fear I'm fucking my life up. Nothing really big and life-changing, no. But just the infinite amount of tiny things that take place every day. Ah well, my, my. So many things are happening in so many aspects of my life right now, it's like I'm caught in a whirlpool. I'm spiraling downward, yet I'm so blissfully unaware of it. I have no idea what I'm doing to myself, and what I'm doing to the people around me. I feel as if I'm screwing up big time. No, correction: I feel as if I'm potentially screwing up big time. Makes sense? I don't know. What am I doing? Why am I doing what I'm doing? I don't know. I think I'm just over-reacting and making a big hoo-ha over nothing really. We do that all the time, don't we all? You develop uncertainties with regards to the things you do and you start getting all philosophical and reflective and wanky in your head. Pfffft. Bloody drama students.Meh. I think I need some sleep. And quality rest. And just some time to just chill properly.
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