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Monday, September 12, 2005
Knowing is better than wondering.Yet how else can I go about trying to know, when I've already posed the question and have gotten a silence as my answer? Does this mean I've already done my part and can therefore say 'I did all that I could and it's now not up to me anymore, I'm merely a pawn that's all part of the larger picture'? Or do I push on and burrow for my answer? Even though that's almost equivalent to unearthing the very ground I stand upon? The stakes are just too big. I can't do it. I've tried, and I've neither succeeded nor failed. It's been an unsatisfactory non-plussed lack of answer. I hate this feeling of being suspended in the middle of nowhere. Makes me vulnerable and helpless.
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