Philosophy 1010 Life Death and Morality

sitting in on e lecture, discussing about when ethics clash with human rights and when do we exercise out right to morality brings me back to the T-block with teo aik cher discussing euthanasia during general paper which i always hated and strove to space out on, but i'm back in the same shoes, different situation, trying to make light of it again............ it;'s funny how we try to escape from one thing only to realise that later on, we willingly put ourselves in a situation where we're faced with that same thing day in day out.........

is it right to kill a serial killer? because by right, we would gain pleasure from killing him, yes no doubt, but does e pleasure we receive amount to e suffering his loved ones might feel? would the pleasure we receive make up for the suffering his victims have been put through?

does God exist? how do we prove that God exists and that the world is dependant on Him?

u realise that to put these theories to test, you gotta cast aside all that you believe in and start from ground zero to build up your case, from an unbiased point of view....... how do you argue for something you feel for and prove it with reason? is it possible to simply cast evrything you believe in aside for the moment and prove your stand with an open mind? and since when was life about reason? the only reason that makes life as bearable as it is is that evrything is illogical and unreasonable, and ot take evrything with a pinch of salt................ how then do we fustify ourselves when we've been living so frivolously?

on another note, i'm struggling with the notion of simply going to school and doing my work and comin home to study to make sure i do well and keeping up with my work and not even joining e clubs and societies and not even the student theatres and not having a life and not even knowing what the night scene is like in melbourne and not catching plays cuz there're just SO many companies and shows going on and i have no idea what's good and what's not and also i have no source of keeping track of all of em,
or to play a darn active role in the uni student theatres and look round at e melbourne theatre companies and see if i can land myself something with them and constantly catch up with the local scene and juggle between school and having a 'life'...........

but the crunch,

is that the very thought of having to keep up with what's going on, meeting ppl, going round in e huge social circles, keeping appearances, patranosing ppl, just makes me so tired......... but then again, shouldnt i enrich myself with the overseas experience? get to know more ppl? get involved w e local scene here to build up my resume? fully experience and live the culture here so i can broaden my scope?

but then again, it's all just too tiring,.......... it's diferent here........ u gotta start from scratch here, from ground zero......... it's tough to build up to the same level as evryone else here when they're got an 18 year start ahead of u........ they know the who's whos and that what-nots......... what do you know? nothing.

"lemma" is latin meaning a good thing
a 'dilemma' is when you've got good things on your hands, and u dunno which to choose and what to do.........

a moral dilemma
a social dilemma

what're the implications? the risks? the consequences?