life is not as kind as you would like it to be

i'm sure we all learn this through our years........ be it the hard way or e easy way............. but what amazes me is how life manages to creep up behind us and drop another shell...... time after time...... again and again......... it's as if we don't learn........ maybe we really don't........... or maybe we just wanna believe life is good after all...........
in a conversation yesterday, i learned bout a friend's definition of love........... u love someone...... until a better person comes along............. ouch............... so much for 'the best i ever had'............. but how do we know when to stop? how do we know that there's not goin to be a better someone? when we've lost that person? to find out that a good friend's definition of something so ephemeral is so transitional......... is just....... shattering.......... it's almost heartbreaking........... how can we be so ungrateful? so callous? so ........ cold?
i learnt bout this from a mutual friend......... hope when i hear it from e horse's mouth it's b something diferent.......... that maybe some truth got lost along the communication line........... i hope......
how can we be so flippant about something that plays such a huge part of our lives? is it because it plays such a huge part that we take it for granted?

miss¿eve
on a lighter note......... i think we're doin it justice.......... we're starting to do it justice........... i hope we can righteously justify it and stand firm and clear in our line of approach........... here's to women......... ***clink***

re-experiences
and i thought i had left it all behind me......... never able to revisit and upturn stones and take part in e going-ons........... i could feel the adrenaline pounding through me as e cold water settled my weary mind and body.......... to be part of the rush-rush........ the last min kancheong-ness.......... the fervent raw energy flooding the space was just wonderful......... i can hardly wait................. but i'm so afraid i'll screw it up....... that i won't be able to reach up to the standard that they've set me......... that i'm supposed to be......... that i've set myself......... i'm sure i can do this........... i want to do this...........

-Random Thought of the Night-
how can you know what u wanna do when you aren't even sure what u can do?

***guilty***