u know u're obsessed when u find yourself looking out for a certain something 24/7...........
when it's e red light and u're looking to see if u spot someone u know in e pedestrains crossing e road...............
when almost evrything conjures up a notion in relation..............
when u hardly know what u're looing for but u're consistently looking for it anyway.................
when u know that whatever u're looking for probably exists only in ur mind..........
when u can't draw a firm concrete conclusion to what u have.............
when all u have are a series of images drawn from air............
when u picture a 'happily ever after' scenario for yourself and u know that's not possible.............
...... cuz there isn't a fairy tale to begin with in e first place..............
when u can't let go....... of nothing.........
when u find yourself rambling on and on about evrything and nothing in particular...........
..... that's when u know u're obsessed............

images............
conjuring up images of never-have-been and never-will-be scenarios..........
wishing.... desperately and hopelessly................
pretending..........
in that miniscule world that's so frail and transparent.............
creating something from nothing............ it's almost an art in itself..............
escapism.......... escaping from nothing............ into something...........
the desperate need for that one thing............
the one thing that could make or break you................... which u don't even know how it works and ticks..............
naivety............
enthusiasm............
inexperience.............
all rolled up into a great ball of........... nothing.........

illusions
delusions
manipulations
creations
fascination

disillusioned.