The current mood of dyseluxon@hotmail.com at www.imood.com

 
The Big Bag of Random Stuff
 

 
We weren't born with a name, we were given a name. A hedgehog doesn't have a name. It's just a nameless thing with a handful of flesh and skin and a beating heart. A hedgehog doesn't even know it doesn't have a name.
 
 
   
 
Monday, November 11, 2002
 
mediacorp called me up yesterday afternoon, asking if i'd like to act in the new season of first touch.. well......... tough luck, filming starts on monday, as does my 'A's.... dang.......... well........... to look at things on a brighter side, least they think i can act........... least i think they think i can............ can you imagine them actually telling me "Girl, go take some acting lessons before coming back to look for us"......... ouch................. scary thoughts.............

i woke up late this morning, awaken by a sms from a friend.............. telling me to buck up for the 'A's.......... it seems as if the big scary 'A's hangs on everyone's lips, 'all the best', 'take care', 'study hard', 'jiayou'........... it's all we can talk about........ life suddenly contracts into the upcoming 3 weeks, nothing else matters......... no talk about shopping, partying, going holidays, reading, leisure......................... it's all about 'Have we studied this?' 'Is this important?' 'How do you do this?'.......... life suddenly becomes so meaningless yet fraught full of definitions and quotations from wider more intellectual minds................

was full of enthusiasm actually, filled with a dreadful anticipation for the next day.......... kinda feeling pretty excited and felt a little adrenaline rush when i walked around the house........ think the exam fever's burning me up.......... getting funny thoughts and feelings................ ***shuddershudder***

i looked at the calender and i realised that well....... my last paper this week's on friday....... and after this week, my next paper's on mon.... lit paper3....... which happens to be my weakest weakest weakest absolutely no hope paper......... i haven't touched it at all since the prelims........... no exacerbation, not exagerrating, ain't lying......... totally brutally honest............ how now brown cow? sigh.............. all that crap about us getting straight 'A's and 'B's even though we screw up our prelims; bollocks........ well it's probably the other way round for me.......... doling relatively well for prelims and screwing up my 'A's............ ha.... that'll be a real joke..........

oh flutter flutter mutter mutter butter butter

Woke up this morning, felt around for my shoes
That's when I knew I had them old walking blues
I woke up this morning, felt around, felt around for my shoes
That's when I knew I had them old, mean old walking blues

Leaving in the morning if I have to, robbed blind
I've been mistreated and I don't mind dying
I'm leaving in the morning if I have to, robbed blind
I've been mistreated and I just don't mind dying

Well some people say boy, the walking blues ain't bad
It's the worst old feelin' I 'most ever had
- 'Walking Blues'

'always on my mind' has been ringing in my mind all day.......... replaying in double time, half time, normal speed........... if the tune actually starts playing in my head tomorrow halfway through math i swear i will just get up and sing it out loud in a trembling alto voice................... okie; then again, maybe not.......... i haven't got a fantastic voice to die for; secondly.......... i don't wanna hafta retake my 'A's as a private candidate........................

i have a fantasy, where halfway through my exam paper, when i'm so frustrated and agitated cuz of all the irritatingly phrased questions and non-existent answers, i'd just slam down my pen and let out a disgruntled roar............. and everyone just ignores me, minding their own workings....... though of course, that's pure fantastical........ in the real world, i'd get a boot in the asre and thrown out of the exam hall, probably barred from taking further examinations after being labelled as unstable........... that'd be a real scream.......... ***no pun intended***

beautiful rainy day today... it rained practically the whole day...... lovely............ nice and cooling....... soothing on the nerves............ rain calms me down......... lifts me up.......... and makes me sound.............. i love the monsoon season that's coming by.......... gloomy and melancholy, perfect setting for the exams......... yet in the midst of this deepset gloom is an underlying peace and life that's waiting to be let out...................

when the rain falls
there's magic in our lives
when the rain falls
we're happy deep inside
when the rain falls
it cleans away the corners of our minds

when the rain falls
the pretty people run
when the rain falls
the colours cloud the sun
when the rain falls
we'll sit and watch the children hurry home

and when everything is blue or green or green or blue or grey
across the street to catch the beat of my heart
and i watch it all cuz there's nothing else to do today
and i watch it all for so long
-'When the rain falls', Suede

well i don't think i'd pretty much be blogging much soon, unless of course, i'm really jaded and a goner........... ah sigh........... i'll miss you bloggie..........

Song of the Moment : Kiss the Girl

Percussion, strings, winds, words.

There you see her,
sitting there across the way.
She don't got a lot to say,
but there's something about her.
And you don't know why,
but you're dying to try,
you wanna Kiss the Girl.

Yes, you want her,
look at her, you know you do.
Possible she want you to,
there is one way to ask her.
It don't take a word,
not a single word,
go on and Kiss the Girl.

Sing with me now.

Sha-la-la-la-la-la, my oh my,
Look like the boy too shy,
Ain't gonna Kiss the Girl.
Sha-la-la-la-la-la, ain't that sad,
Ain't it a shame, too bad
he gonna miss the girl.

Now's your moment,
floating in a blue lagoon.
Boy, you'd better do it soon,
no time will be better.
She don't say a word,
and she won't say a word
until you Kiss the Girl.

Sha-la-la-la-la-la, don't be scared,
you got the moves prepared,
Go on and Kiss the Girl.
Sha-la-la-la-la-la, don't stop now
Don't try to hide it, how
you wanna Kiss the Girl
Sha-la-la-la-la-la, float along
and listen to the song,
the song say Kiss the Girl.
Sha-la-la-la-la-la, music play
do what the music say,
You wanna Kiss the Girl.

You got to Kiss the Girl
(kiss her, kiss her, kiss her)
Go on and Kiss the Girl
(kiss her, kiss her, kiss her)
You gotta Kiss the Girl.
(kiss her, kiss her, kiss her)
Go on and Kiss the Girl!

 

 
   
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